Thursday, December 8, 2011

2011: The Year in Musical Fail

By now, most of you will have already pegged the biggest musical fails to be Rebecca Black's "Friday" and Metallica and Lou Reed's Lulu. However, there is still more fail where that came from this year.

1. Guns n'Roses' disastrous Rock in Rio performance of Mr. Brownstone.
This is Mr. Brownstone as it was performed at Rock in Rio in 1991.
This is Mr. Brownstone as it was performed at Rock in Rio in 2011.
Any questions?
Axl has always been considered one of the greatest lead singers in the history of hard rock music. However, that fateful night this past October was embarrassing to his own legacy. Axl looked like Yosemite Sam really let himself go and I was surprised that he was able to fit himself and his ego in that gaudy-ass coat.

2. Bill O'Reilly attacks socially conscious rapper Common.
Bill O'Reilly continued his attack on mainstream rap music this year by attacking Common, who read poetry to kids in the White House. Bill O'Reilly was offended that they invited Common to the White House because of foul language in his lyrics and his radical political views on defending Assata Shakur and Mumia Abu Jamal amongst other alleged cop killers.

It then led to Jon Stewart obliterating O'Reilly both on his Daily Show and on Bill's own show The O'Reilly Factor. I could even sort of understand why Mr. O'Reilly has attacked other rappers such as Ludacris and Cam'ron because of their lyrics. However, Common is the least offensive rapper in the mix. I've got about 435 reasons to be angry about Washington more than I do some rapper that gets invited to the White House.

3. The Year in Kim Kardashian
Yes, Kim Kardashian invaded music this year, too. In fact, it's more of a fail than her marriage ever was this year. The year started off when she was invited to go on stage at a Prince concert. It's bad when a middle aged lady knows more what to do on stage than Kim does. It's even worse when Kim's had practice. No, not that kind of practice, this kind...you would think that that would be the worst of it, but we're not done yet.

Somehow, Kimmy K. thought she could be the next Apollonia by starting her own music career. And then this happened. Get off the stage, Kim...and take The Dream with you.

4. Limp Bizkit: Don't Call It a Comeback
Yes, Limp Bizkit attempted to return to their glory days by releasing Gold Cobra. And it actually did make sense seeing as other acts such as Hollywood Undead were becoming popular. Unfortunately for Limp Bizkit, many people were trying to forget those days where they wore their red Yankee cap backwards and arbitrarily grabbed their crotch. You want a visual representation of the music on Gold Cobra?



That covers it. Within the year, Limp Bizkit left their longtime home at Interscope Records.

5. Nickelback honors the Thanksgiving tradition of being the invitee that nobody actually wants there.

How hated do you have to be to be petitioned to go away? Nickelback performed at Detroit's Thanksgiving game against the Green Bay Packers, which many fans thought was cruel and unusual punishment. They lost to the Packers and had to listen to Nickelback for the halftime show. As of this post, they haven't won a game since Nickelback performed.

Well, as you can clearly see, there's much more to the year in suck than you may have previously thought. Now let us never speak of this year this way again.

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