Saturday, May 2, 2009

Sexiest Songs...

My lists are going to be a little bit different. I don't want to post round numbers all the time. It makes things a bit easier to qualify and a bit more interesting.

1. Nine Inch Nails-Closer: OMG, duhhhh. You can't have a list like this and not expect this song to be on it. It's just not possible. While I'm at it, I'd like to add 2. "La Mer", 3. "Even Deeper", 4."The Hand That Feeds", 5. "All the Love in the World", 6."Me, I'm Not", and 7. "Discipline" (if you're into that sort of thing).

8. Deftones-Digital Bath: Even though NIN is #'s 1-7, I think that the Deftones' Digital Bath is perhaps sexier than those. 

9. Deftones-Change (in the House of Flies): I'd heard this song covered at a Seether song a few years ago, turned around and saw two people basically dry humping. It works.

10. Finger Eleven-Paralyzer: You may think this is a surprising choice, but this is like the rock version of "Jizz In My Pants".

11. The Lonely Island-Jizz In My Pants: That's right I said it.

12. Flyleaf-All Around Me: This song is less about being closer to God and more about being closer to God...

13. Hoobastank-Inside of You: Notice how most of the songs on this list are danceable. You can't have a sexy song without being close to someone.

14. Hurt-Pandora: A recent song off of their new album Goodbye to the Machine. It's less tongue in cheek and more tongue in somewhere else.

15. Melissa Auf Der Maur-Taste You: I don't know what's sexier...this song...or this song in French.

16. A Perfect Circle-Thinking of You: This may very well be my favorite music video ever. It's violent, it's sexy...exactly what masturbation should be about!

17. Psychostick-Orgasm = Love: This song is pretty. This song is disturbing. This song is pretty disturbing.

18. Red-Lost: Not so much an obvious choice, but listen to the words and I think and hope you'd agree.

19. Skratch n'Sniff-Addicted to Lollipops: Who knew that a remix would ever make this list? A mashup of Saving Abel's "Addicted" and Lil' Wayne's "Lollipop"'s as if the songs themselves had sex and made a baby with facial tattoos.

20. Framing Hanley-Lollipop: While we're on far as videos go, this was the sexiest one of all of last year. Unlike the porn I'm accustomed to, this one actually had dialogue! Well, that and strip poker.

21. Korn-A.D.I.D.A.S.: This is not a song about footwear, unless you're referring to fuck me pumps.

22. The Urgency-Fingertips: Because subtlety is overrated.


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